Gary's Random Thoughts

moving

2007-06-04T22:49:00.000-05:00

moving. moving! ya know, it's almost a four letter word. at least it's close to a curse. you have to pack up your current house so you can carry it all to a new house. no wonder it's one of the top stressers. ranks right up there with money problems - and it could cause money problems if you don't approach it right. but it's not just about packing and unpacking. it's about painting - and i hate painting - with a passion. it's about getting new appliances and trying to demonstrate your lack of knowledge in hooking about auto ice makers, etc. it's about trying to decide where to put the furniture and stuff in the new place. it's about painting - and i hate - oh yeah, already went there on that one. it's about how things don't work simply when you are trying to fix little things in an older house - you know, plumbing leaks, etc. it's about organizing who will help when and what they will help with. and it's about money and it's about money. aren't you glad God isn't stressful and that the grace found in Jesus is free.

memorial day

2007-05-29T22:02:00.000-05:00

we just celebrated one of the most significant holidays in our history - the history of the US that is - memorial day. throughout history man has never come to the place where they get along totally. in other words we have never, ever experienced whirled peas, er, world peace. it hasn't happened. yet we live in this great country. why, because there have always been people who have realized that freedom is not free. it comes at a cost and that cost has been the lives of brave men and women who have been willing to pay the ultimate cost - their lives. i, for one, want to thank them. as a viet nam vet i know that what they do is not always supported. however, i support you. i thank you that you are willing to do what you are doing. i thank you that you are willing to fight the good fight. i thank you that you are following in the steps of Jesus who never gave up on His cause.

hump day

2007-05-16T06:20:00.000-05:00

it's wednesday. this day is also known as hump day. i have always found this fascinating. it is my understanding that it's called hump day because it's half way through the work week. on mondays we wish it was wednesdays - hump day - and on wednesday we wish it was friday. when we're 5 we wish we were in school. when we're 10 we wish we were a teenager. when we're 13 we wish we were 16. when we're 16 we wish we were 18. when we're 18 we wish we were 21. when we're in high school we wish we were in college or working and making big bucks. when we're working we wish it was wednesday, then friday. we spend a great part of our life wishing it away. then we hit middle age and we wish it all back again as we wish we were in our 20's. we're always wishing for something other than what we have or where we are, as if we aren't happy or contented with where we are. aren't you glad that in Jesus we can be happy in Him, contented everyday, and that His mercies are new every morning.

bad boy

2007-05-12T15:00:00.000-05:00

wow, march 3rd. can you believe it. march 3rd. that's the last time i wrote a blog. what's wrong with me. well, we don't have enough time to thoroughly investigate that question. busy, busy, busy. the american way of life. busy! but, hey, that's not an excuse, is it? why so busy? honestly, two reasons. i don't know how to say no and i don't want to say no when it comes to civic involvement. i love being in the community and helping. i was asked to help on a number of committees and stuff, and couldn't say no and didn't want to say no. so, bye bye blogging. but it was a fruitful time. but, a lot of that stuff has gone by the wayside, so it's back to surfing through life - and jefferson city is now a better place, or so i'd like to think - not so much for what i did, but because of what the committees did to address social concerns here in the city - or at least start assessing the concerns. after all, isn't that what Jesus did - assess social concerns by finding where people were, what they were dealing with, getting to know them, and then helping them.

cell phones

2007-03-03T14:56:00.000-06:00

i looked and behold i had not posted anything since february 9th. woe is me, woe is me. so, instead of staying in the woe i decided to post something. they only problem is that i don't know what to post. in fact, i haven't even titled this yet cuz i want to see what pops up on the screen as my fingers randomly float across the keyboard ocassionally pushing this key and that. i got a new cell phone yesterday. it's really cool. you can tune into the weather channel, and fox news, and espn. you can play games and take pictures and play music. oh yeah, you can also make phone calls and receive them. the question i have is why all the other stuff. personally i think it's a conspiracy by the twenty somethings to have something that the 50+ folks can't understand. i think someone should file a lawsuit against someone. but, i'm not waiting for the lawsuit - i'm taking my own action. i'm learning the phone - in less than 24 hours and after only 3 phone calls and 2 visits to the twentysomething that sold me the phone while smiling all the while. aren't you glad that God wasn't involved in a conspiracy when He sent Jesus to the cross?

heart

2007-02-09T00:16:00.000-06:00

an amazing organ this thing called the heart. it just keeps on beating - and is so easily taken for granted. same for your other heart - you know, your innermost being. it also can be so easily taken for granted. that can be hard - i mean, it is where love is generated from, which is really kind of scary. why? because it seems to be so fragile. you put it out there and then it gets stomped on and it becomes even more fragile - and kind of self-protective. it does not want to venture out on this road of love so quickly the next time. and if it has another negative experience and another - well, the old heart finds this innermost cave and just goes in and hibernates and we stop using our heart to guide us, but start using the buttons and triggers that replaced it. and that is very, very sad. i am very glad that Jesus never stomps on my heart. i am very glad that Jesus heals my heart so it does not die in the cave.

amazing

2007-01-22T14:34:00.000-06:00

you know, when you think about it, life is pretty amazing. let's start with the fact that my lungs and heart keep working. pretty important, don't you think. and i don't even think about them - they just keep chugging along - for greater than 525,600 hours so far - now that is amazing. that's just the beginning. the rest of my body - well, most of it anyway - is still working. and i'm surrounded by amazing things. stores where they charge you the right price by just passing the product over a camera. amazing. how about the mountains. ever just taken a hike and sat up a trail somewhere and just looked at the creation and listened to the elk bugle - amazing. and the ocean. amazing. i have seen the ocean over a period of 40+ years and the waves keep coming in and the tide keeps coming in and going out. wow! how about the birth of a baby. now that is amazing. absolutely beautiful. i could go on and on for hours. i mean we are surrounded by amazing things - cars, tvs, furniture, air, trees, people, ipods, 'puters, pens, pencils, paper, bathrooms, houses, dung beetles, birds, baseball teams, paper clips, etc - all truly amazing. but you know what, the most amazing thing of all is God and Jesus - for in Them is the beginning of everything else that is amazing.

snow

2007-01-21T03:05:00.000-06:00

o, how beautiful you are as you fall from the sky. slowly wafting back and forth, floating with the breeze, each flake different from the rest i'm told. it's majestic the way each flake approaches the earth and so softly lands upon the ground. how magnificent is your power as you gather together with your brother and sister flakes to form a layer that blankets creation. how mighty and powerful you are as you accumalate and bind together, combining your muscles and bring man and car to a standstill. and then you begin to show your evil side as yoy become merciless, stopping even those that must get from here to there, from home to work, or to help those in distress. and how resistant you can be as people begin to try and remove you as you fight every shovel that is struck into you, every blade that is plunged into your side. and then yes, the final blow, even as you are loosing the battle to be done away with, you strike this person's back in pain, or this child's arm or leg as they plunge down a hill, or how about the novice on the ski slope for the first time. yes, snow is so beautiful and yet so unwelcome; so pleasant to the eyes and yet can be so harmful to those that try and master it. snow is so amazing and powerful in it's many attributes. in fact, it kind of reminds me of it's Creator - God, who can be so awesome when you walk with Him and yet so devastating when you oppose Him. thank You Lord for snow and it's many mysteries and personalities. And thank You Lord for Your many mysteries and mercies and grace.

winter

2007-01-18T15:18:00.000-06:00

don't you just love it! winter, that is. i mean who can't get into snow storms, ice storms, and being without power. shows us how spoiled we are, doesn't it. i mean, can you imagine being on the plains, in the woods, or in the mountains during the winters as a pioneer. wow! instead of ice cream you had frozen buffalo legs for snacks. instead of candy or chips for snacks you had mush made from corn that was stored the previous fall. and the doctors say don't use saturated fat to fry your food. how about your steak being fried in lard or saturated fat. i love it. i mean i love winter. it brings out our survival instincts. i mean think about what goes through your mind as you chip away the ice or shovel snow drifts that are 3-6 feet high. just don't say them. kind of helps you see where your mind is, doesn't it. and what about when you want to hop in the car and drive to somewhere just to get out of the house. and those pioneers were excited about getting out after being in their cabin for days if not weeks. man, do we have it good, or what? and who says God hasn't blessed us.

new year

2006-12-29T04:49:00.000-06:00

well, the old is almost behind and the new is rapidly approaching - just a couple of days. it will be 365 days or 8760 hours or 525,600 minutes or 31,536,000 seconds (give or take) long - just like this past year. so what is the difference? who knows. but, i'm excited! it's a new year, full of new things. new adventures at wal-mart. new friends. new interactions with people that have road rage. new opportunities to help people. new door dings on your new car. new moments of reflection upon how you've been blessed. new stress. new peace. new math. new times with your kids. new things that will show you that anger management class didn't quite work. new stuff. new deadlines at work that seem so impossible. new accomplishments at work that seemed so impossible. new dishes of food that make you think of the old ones. new blessings that came out of no where. new impediments. new opportunities. new politicians that are really the same old ones. new growth - physically, mentally, and spiritually. new challenges at stores that have totally rearranged everything for the better - yeah, right. new flowers in the spring. new challenges. new accomplishments. new restaurants that wish you never visited. new restaurants that you're glad you visited. yep, the new year will be full of new things, new experiences, and new frustrations. are you glad God is the same, yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

old year

2006-12-27T05:08:00.000-06:00

well, it's that time of year again, folks. the old is fleeing away. or, should i say has almost vanished. it's amazing how fast it has gone. what i want to know is who stole the 123 days that made this past year seem like only 242 days. was it the grinch? no, he only stole christmas. was it some golf cart freak? nope, he only steals golf balls. was it the dude that cut you off the other day while driving to the store? nope, he only stole a happy moment. so, who is it? or, did anyone steal anything. i mean, somebody did! it has to be. there is no other logical answer. i mean, i was talking to my neighbor and he made a ridiculous statement about it having something to do with getting older. get thee behind me, satan! can't buy that. older! forget it. or is it like that person at the hardware store mumbled, "i'm so busy i loose track of not only days, but months and years. well, folks, whatever it is, the year was still 365 days, 876,000 hours, 52,560,000 minutes, or 3,153,600,000 seconds long (ok for you scientists, i may be a few seconds off). it didn't change. we did. we changed greatly. and aren't you glad that that change for old to new and bad to good hasn't gone - it's coming with us. because God used the bad to build good and the old to bring new. and fortunately, He never changes.

christmas

2006-12-20T21:27:00.000-06:00

oh no! i did it! i used that word - that word, christmas. i wasn't suppose to. i was suppose to use happy holiday or winter holiday or, or, or something - something more politically correct. something that wouldn't offend someone. something that is milk toast that has nothing to do with anything. wait. got a question. why is it that when other people mention other words, you know hannakah, kwanza, ramadan that i'm not offended. not at all. seeing their colors or their symbols doesn't seem to impact me or my friends or others that say that word - you know, christmas. isn't it wonderful that even in the midst of political correctness that Jesus was still born and that He is still Lord of Lords and King of Kings and that we can celebrate His birth everyday and not only on christmas.

it's over

2006-10-30T14:30:00.000-06:00

in the words of yogi berra, "it's not over until its over". well, it's over. the cards won! to everyone's surprise - even mine, though i foolishly told my brother-in-law in a public place that the cards would win it in five. i really didn't believe it - i was just being foolish at the time, which wasn't really foolish at all as it turns out. so, the baseball season is over. it's over. words that most don't like. we hear them too often in life. it's over. the game is over. the job is done. sadly, you even hear them more and more when it comes to marriages. it's over. you hear similar words at funerals - well, their life is over - it's over. no wonder we don't like those words - they almost always signal that something we like or love or enjoy has come to an end. it's over - aren't we glad that when God utters those words that those in Christ will just be beginning?

confusion

2006-10-27T02:13:00.000-05:00

now that is an interesting word - confusion. i really don't know anyone that likes this word - that likes to live in a state of confusion. the folks i know like nice, orderly lives - even though they don't always live them. i mean, who does? personally, i think confusion gets a bad rap. like when you go into your favorite store and everything has been rearranged. confusion? no! opportunity! this scenario gives you an opportunity to out think the store manager. see, i'm convinced they do that to get you to walk by something you don't need at a time when you don't need it so that you buy it. the opportunity comes amidst confusion to figure out the illogical place that they put the product so you can take the shortest route and not walk past the item you don't need at the time you don't need it so you don't buy it. confused? so am i - but God isn't.

vacation

2006-10-18T08:27:00.000-05:00

wow! aren't vacations great? they are times to get away. times to see new things. times to experience new things. like, visiting the wal-mart in ticonderoga, new york. hey, it's a big deal there. where is ticonderoga? about 8 miles south of crown point where we were. where fort ticonderoga is located. seriously, vacations are great. they are times to experience this wonderful land - earth - that God has created. the beauty in up state new york and vermont and canada is breath taking. the people were great. vacations are a time of refreshing. and we were refreshed. and we relaxed. and we learned about a lot of stuff about our history. which makes me think about how good God has been to us. which makes me think about His refreshing. aren't we glad that we are continually refreshed in God?

anger

2006-09-13T22:05:00.000-05:00

i ask myself the question, "am i an angry person?" i think i can unequivocally say no. do i get angry? this time i can unequivocally say yes. so, what is the difference. well, an angry person is one that is constantly screaming at drivers when they do anything that interferes with their driving. or an angry person is one that is constantly running their grocery cart into other grocery carts at the supermarket. a person that just gets angry ocassionally gets upset with another driver - like when they run a red light and almost hit them. or a person that just gets angry ocassionally runs their grocery cart into another when the driver of the other cart maliciously plows into their cart and curses at them (and then only if that person appears to be a wimp). regardless, the world has way too much anger in it. listen to the politicians. aren't they a shining example of how we aren't to be, especially right now leading up to election time. so far i haven't been able to tell what anyone is for. but, i do know how much the candidates dislike the people they are running against. i don't know about you, but i don't like anger. when i get angry i feel bad later. and when someone is angry with me i shut down and don't communicate. even more so i don't want to be on the receiving end of God's anger.

poor

2006-09-09T12:50:00.000-05:00

poor. poor! aaaaagh! just the mere mention of that word makes peoples skin crawl. poor. no one wants to be that way. everyone wants food, clothing, shelter, toys (which vary according to age), transportation (in america preferably a car), drink, job, friends, ipods, computers, 1.5 vs 512 internet, pets, sbox 360 (until the next bigger gamer comes along - and then we'll want that one) and on and on and on and on. why do we hate poor? because we find value in wealth. we find personal value in things. but do we find happiness. many would say yes. let me ask you a question. why is it then that we get bored with what we have and always want bigger and badder? because we're still not happy. yet God said blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. is there anything better than that?

fear

2006-09-07T03:01:00.000-05:00

i was talking with a friend earlier this evening and we were discussing fear. now, i have to confess i really don't like that word - not at all. the very thought of the word strikes fear in me. i mean there are so many things to fear. people who drive stick shifts while talking on their cell phone. people who run red lights while talking on their cell phone. people who fail to yield or use their turn signals while talking on their cell phone. pit bulls. thinking about your future and knowing that your bank account is empty. rattlesnakes. a person that is suffering from a severe hangover pushing a shopping cart around the grocery store. a rude person - a very rude person. sharks. whether i will get the grade i need to maintain my scholarship or not. that my child might fall and hurt themselves while playing. whether a tornado will hit my area, let alone my house. whether we will have another katrina or not. termites. is this sickness unto death? did my neighbor figure out that i was the one that drove across their yard? being stuck in an elevator. heights. isn't it wonderful that if we see God as the sunshine in our lives and fear Him that all the other fears fade away?

it doesn't happen that way

2006-08-25T05:43:00.000-05:00

have you seen alton brown's new road food show where he tools across the country on a motorcycle in 30 days and stops at all these out of the way restaurants to eat their specialty? it's pretty cool. they solicited public opinion on places that had great "road food" - restaurants, bars, etc - and then plotted out a 30 day trip from east coast to west coast based on the places they would stop. isn't life kind of like that - where we plan it out - we're born, we go to school, then maybe college or some other training, then we work for many years, and then retire and then we . . . but, it rarely works out as we planned, doesn't it? it just doesn't always seem to happen that way. it didn't with alton either - the wipeout on the back road wasn't in the agenda. life has a way of throwing curves or whatever - yeah, even a bean ball from time to time. you know what's really nice though, God's plan always happens the way He intended.

i'm back #2

2006-08-16T08:10:00.000-05:00

the first and most obvious question is this: if my previous post was true then why are you having to post #2? that is a good question since there is a good bit of time since my last post. am i just forgetful? did i make too many trips to the outlet mall at the lake? was i sick? do i not care? do i think that blogging is an absolutely waste of time? were my wife and i on a vacation? these are all good questions - very good questions. however, i think the answer to all of them are no. actually, i don't have a good, simple answer. it's actually a lot more complicated than just no or yes. the bottom line: aren't you glad that God is more dependable than me?

i'm back

2006-07-19T09:35:00.000-05:00

yep, i'm back. however, the real question is, did i ever leave? well, it depends on how you define leave. does that mean i move - uh, no. did i go on a long trip - umh, no. i did take some short trips - like to kansas city for a few days and to versailles, mo for a couple of days - to a great bed and breakfast and a cool little tea room. i guess i would define 'i'm back' as all of a sudden i remembered i had a blog. so, i'm back. more to follow . . .

three heroes

2006-05-20T22:25:00.000-05:00

wow! how long has it been since i've posted something on this blog? ages and ages. ok, maybe not that long, but it seems that long. why? because they (whoever they are) say things come in threes. and so it has. my mother passed away about five weeks ago. then the brother of a man that is in the church i serve was killed in iraq about two weeks ago. then the father of another person in the church i serve passed away serveral days ago. man, does that ever make you think and ask lots of questions. like why? especially the 19 year old marine. where did they go? can they see us? what would they tell us if they could about life after death? are they a part of that great cloud of witnesses? are the streets really gold? what does God look like? i know my mom is in heaven because she had a personal relationship with Jesus, and i'm told the others did, too. so, do they know each other now? think about that, my mom, who is a hero in my eyes, and a young marine who is also a hero for giving his life for what he believed in - this country and us, and a father from long island, who is a hero to his daughter all hanging out together. talk about three's company! but, i must admit, it's been real draining for me. a friend of mine called the other day to see if i was ok with it all. they may be dancing on streets that are golden, but it's a little tough down here for the near future. but, hey, some day i'll be dancing on those same streets. i hope to see you there.

stuff, more stuff and stuffed

2006-05-02T23:00:00.000-05:00

have you ever walked into a lowe's or home depot or some other super hardware store? wow! talk about stuff. cool stuff. plumbing stuff. electrical stuff. bathroom stuff. seasonal stuff. storage stuff. more cool stuff. appliance stuff. radical stuff. lawn care stuff. sweet stuff. i mean stuff and stuff and stuff - everywhere you look. start in aisle one and go all the way to aisle 32 - stuff everywhere. enough stuff to keep you busy for months and years and decades - and you're still in the store. kind of reminds me of life in general. stuff everywhere. food stuff. friend stuff. work stuff. play stuff. eating stuff. sleeping stuff. exercise stuff. car stuff. hang out stuff. reading stuff. all kinds of stuff to keep us busy and to provide us everything as quickly as a microwave. but, man, at the end of the day it's easy to feel, well, stuffed. it almost becomes overwhelming - like a heavy load that we have to carry and keep doing just so we use all the stuff that we have acquired from lowes and home depot and sears and kohl's and saks and the neighborhood garage sale. what a burden! is there not a light load. what? what was that? who said "come unto me all you who labor and are heavy laden,"and "my yoke is easy and my burden is light?" who said that? we can live life peacefully through Jesus.

where am i?

2006-04-27T18:40:00.000-05:00

oh no! here it comes! another random thought. now, what in the world could he be thinking about now, you ask? well, who knows. just a lot of random thoughts. hey, i know, let's play a game. i'm going to describe a place and i want you to see if you can guess where it is. now, no cheating. don't look for the answer at the end. in this place there is continuous music. there are kids (and adults) dancing. people have smile on their faces. others are sitting at their computers (like me) and typing, surfin the web, or whatever. others are walking around. a few are stretched out on chairs, motionless, probably sleeping. some folks are reading while others are singing. small groups of people huddle here and there in private conversation. people walk up to each other and greet one another with hugs and kisses. over time people come and go. and always, always these people are relaxed, at peace, and even joyful unto the point of being giddy. so, where am i? am i in a coffee house? am i at the mall? am i at a bar? am i at a dance? am i at a family reunion? am i at a big picnic at a park or somewhere? where am I? if you guessed any of those then you're wrong. i'm at church - the church God imagined, not the church man built. imagine that.

life

2006-04-26T12:15:00.000-05:00

you know, i was sitting here thinking about life. man, is it ever so fleeting. here today and gone tomorrow. now, why am i saying this - so seriously. a couple of things. first, my mom died, er, rather as my wife put it, "went to be with the Lord", the other day and i just came back from a press conference at the salvation army center where it was announced that they received an emergency grant from the united way to continue to operate. these two things got me to thinking. life. what is it all about. and for me, it came down to this choice - is life about getting or giving? my mom's life was about giving, even though she never had much - but she was always generous with what she had. that's what happened this morning, too. the united way gave so that the salvation army could keep on giving - and everyone was smiling and clapping and happy. why? because they were giving. ever watch a person that just kept getting. two things usually mark their personaity - the desire to get more and being unhappy that they haven't gotten enough. my mom was always happy in her giving. getting didn't excite her. ya know something, kind of reminds me of someone else that more into giving than getting - Jesus.

paranoia

2006-04-03T00:06:00.000-05:00

i was thinking the other day - yeah, i know, there he goes again - thinking. anyway, i was thinking about stuff - nothing in particular, just stuff. and i came up with this great idea. in fact it is so great i'm sure i can get a patent on it and make millions. i'd love to tell you about the idea, but i can't - you see, it's not patented yet. however, it is a great idea. it will make your life a lot more interesting, if not fun. yes, in fact, it will radically change your life. for the better, i might add. gee, it's too bad i can't tell you about it. or maybe i can. nope, i don't think so. i mean, you might patent it yourself and i'd be out millions. i mean, you might know how to navigate the highways and biways of the beauracacy better and quicker than me. you might know how to fill out the applications quicker and in a more acceptable way. you might even have a computer program that can fill it out and submit it before i could fill out the first line. and i'd be broke before i became a multi-millionaire. now what do i do? what can i do? you're out there. i know it. you're lurking in the shadows trying to figure out how to steal my idea, my millions. and you're probably smarter and better looking. the beauracacy will think it's your idea and not mine. i'm doomed. it's been stolen. i've lost it all. my patent application will be rejected because yours was there first. i think i'll just take a sleeping pill and go to bed. it was great having an idea. too bad it didn't work out. too bad you got the patent on toilet paper before me. good night.

thinking

2006-03-31T02:12:00.000-06:00

it's been almost two weeks since i've posted something on this blog. does that mean i haven't been thinking - having random thoughts? nope, not at all. they keep coming. why, i went to lowe's the other day and i wondered whether i should start in the garden section or the plumbing? then a random thought hit me - why not visit both? so i did! didn't buy anything, but at least it proved to me my random thought brain was still engaged. thinking is vitally important. you have to keep your mind going. at least i do. and i don't think i'm that different. that's what's so wonderful about reading. it makes you think. no, i'm not talking about those mindless books that have the same old storyline that keeps us on the edge of our seats. i'm talking about books that say outlandish things. i'm talking about books that say things that just don't seem possible. i'm talking about books that say things that just can't be grasped on the surface. i'm talking about books that allow us to peak into real people's lives and their thoughts. i'm talking about the Bible. people just dismiss it. why? because they don't think about what it says. you know, chew on it, turn it over in your mind, view it from various angles. you know, think about it.

brains

2006-03-15T08:52:00.000-06:00

i love my brain. it is so unusual. (i know i have one because it has been looked at from both sides and i have two pieces of paper that say i have a brain.) i think at times that it has a mind of its own. i can be in the middle of something or reading something and it will just take off on its own traveling down some mysterious corridor bent on examining some inconsequential (at least to the moment) fact or place or person or animal or something. and it's so darn sneaky. sometimes i don't even notice the fact that it's left me standing alone until several minutes later. i think that is absolutely amazing. think about it. my brain left and i went right on. while it was off doing it's own thing my body kept right on driving down the road (scary, huh!), reading the same book, doing the same chore, or doing whatever. i think that is amazing. how does that happen? i don't know, but this i know, the brain is much, much more complex than anyone knows - and it's just a piece of muscle, or whatever. and they say it just happened - just kind of evolved over time. think about it. and oh yeah, God, what's your thoughts about this?

a trip

2006-02-28T09:17:00.000-06:00

a couple of weeks ago i decided to take a trip. you know, one of those getaway things. the kind you need every once in a while to shake the cobwebs out of your mind so that you can gather yourself and get your brain straight so you can step back into the race of life. so i left jeff city and headed west. it wasn't a random trip but a trip with an appointed destination. i was going to ihop - no, not the place that sells pancakes (though i did have pancakes for breakfast this morning) - but a place that specializes in prayer in south kansas city called international house of prayer. i've been there before; however, i decided to take a three day retreat and spend it there. (i'm actually writing this from ihop.) i've noticed something very dramatic. hundreds of young people coming and going and in between the coming and going they were hanging out with Jesus. every race, every type was represented from the yuppie type dressers to mr. tatoo to noticing pierces in every place you can pierce on a face to one dude that had the tallest mohawk i've ever seen to the gothic. why do i say this, because they were not like the fresh vegetables at a produce section in a grocery store that is separated by some type of partition. they all were worshipping God. they were all interacting and hugging each other. it didn't matter what they looked like. relationship was what it was all about. this is what the church is all about. everyone. you don't have to conform to someone elses's image, only the image of Jesus - and He is the one that needs to change people, not people. the bottom line: i saw the church and i knew that God was pleased.

commitment

2006-02-27T05:50:00.000-06:00

have you ever noticed that there are certain words that are just not popular? they seem to carry a very negative association with them. they conjure up negative feelings. they just don't feel comfortable. they make you squirm. one of those words that seems to be getting more and more negative today is commitment. you see it everywhere. people don't work for the same employer nearly as long - the loyalty just doesn't seem to be there. more and more men and women are simply living together vs. "tying the knot". families no longer live close to each other and are often spread out across the country, or around the world. have you ever asked yourself why? does it have anything to do with commitment? what do we think of the word commitment? what does it mean? the dictionary says that commitment is the act of commiting; a giving in charge or entrusting; a pledge; something that requires an obligation. in other words it requires giving of at least part of yourself to someone or something else. wow! scary indeed. if i do that i might get hurt. i mean who or what can i trust? i might get into a situation that is too uncomfortable for me. i might be put in a place where i have to carry someone's burden, their stuff. i might find that i am yoked with someone or something where things are not always comfortable and it feels very heavy. i was there but then i found out that His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

life and happiness

2006-02-24T10:21:00.000-06:00

have you ever asked yourself what the purpose of life is? i mean are we here just to exist? did we just accidentally come into existence - you know, hey, here's my mom and dad, and they kind of did their thing and they had me and there really is no purpose beyond that. yeah, we'll try to be happy; we'll acquire things to help make me happy; we'll find jobs that will make me happy so we can acquire things to make us happy; we'll get educated in some way, to do something so we can be happy, so we can find jobs that we like so we can buy stuff that makes us happy; and on and on. is that the purpose of our lives? if that is then do we really have a purpose out side of our own existence? or were we created for a purpose - to walk according to a divine plan? i don't know about you but i can get pretty bored and tired of trying to wrap my life around making me happy. however, i find great joy and happiness in getting out of myself and serving others. maybe Jesus really knew what He was talking about.

christian hedonism

2006-02-16T22:31:00.000-06:00

what's this - christian hedonism?! aren't those two words that don't fit together. i mean, hedonism is the pursuit of pleasure! christianity is a bunch of rules, regulations, charts, cannots, and hypocrisy. what's that have to do with pleasure? well, nothing! if that is what christianity is, then the two words don't fit together. but, the bigger question is, is that what christianity is all about. well, that's what you see in most places. i remember attending a church service many years ago and this dude had this chart that was a good 15-20 ft long - depicting time from the beginning to the end. it was full of symbols and things - even had a john deere combine on it. it supposedly laid out everything God was up to, all the way to the end. i walked away believing that was what christianity was all about - for many years. then i discovered something, i was wrong. it's not about all of that - it's about how a couple of people use to have such a great relationship with God that they hung out with Him in this fantastic garden - and they were naked. then the relationship was broken - and they got dressed to hide their shame. the rest of the story - God is restoring that relationship through Jesus. why? relationship - not rules, regulations, charts, cannots, and hypocrisy. man, is that cool, or what? relationship with the King of kings and the Lord of lords - for eternity.

horse and carriage

2006-02-05T23:03:00.000-06:00

remember the old song that had the line in it that talked about a horse and carriage going together like love and marriage? you don't, huh? guess i'm dating myself. oh well. anyway, there was this song that had those lines. i always found the song interesting because there is only one way that you can put a horse and carriage. now, have you ever seen a horse pushing a carriage. well, ok during one of the super bowl budweiser commercials a couple of clydesdales were helping a young clydesdale by pushing the wagon the clydesdales normally pull. but, hey, other than that, have you? i mean, when's the last time you saw a couple snuggling together in a carriage that was being pushed by a horse? so, there's only one way it can be done. aren't you glad it's not like that when you think of another great couple - Jesus and prayer. with Jesus and prayer it works either way. when you think about Jesus it just naturally leads to prayer. you start thinking of Him, about Him and you just start talking to Him and listening to His voice. Or, if you start praying, you just naturally start asking Him questions or telling Him how wonderful He is or asking Him if He can help you out with this or that - which leads you to listening for His response. Jesus and prayer. Prayer and Jesus. now that's what i call a couple that works well together.

prayer

2006-01-28T04:30:00.000-06:00

have you ever wondered what prayer is about? the simple answer is that it's all about talking to and listening to God - and that is very, very true. but, why pray? i mean what is the real purpose of prayer? i mean i talk to people all day long. i listen to people all day long. what do i gain out of it? is it like watching your favorite movie - yeah, that's part of it, because you're gaining information as you listen to the actors recite their lines. is it like giving a lecture or a sermon or describing an incident to a friend - again, yes, that's part of it, because you're giving information out. these two parts - giving and gaining information together help make up prayer - but is that all. prayer, meditation, whatever it is called is practiced by millions of people. i read an article about some very successful businessman the other day that starts every day with meditation - because it clears his mind and prepares him for the day. even that is part of prayer. but, i'm still not satisfied. what is prayer really about? i've come to this conclusion - prayer is about being able to walk into the Holy of holies, through the curtain in the temple that was rent when Jesus was crucified, and crawl up on Daddy's lap, then pulling His big arms around me, and just having a great time sharing my heart and listening to His so that my heart becomes more and more like His heart. i think that is prayer and i thank God that through Jesus He made prayer possible. as the deer pants for the water so my soul pants for You o God.

friends

2006-01-27T09:35:00.000-06:00

what are friends? good question; maybe a better question is, what are friends for? i think that question is a bit tougher. friends are people we like hanging out with. friends are people that are just there. you can watch football with them. you can take a hike or backpack with them. you can ride bicycles with them. you can talk to them. these all give hints to what friends are for, but have you ever sat down and meditated on or analyzed the purpose of friends? first, i believe they are a gift - they are given to us for a purpose. i think true friends encourage us, want us to be blessed even when they aren't, bless us with wisdom, pick us up when we are down, don't abdicate the relationship when we screw up, gently head us in the right direction when we're heading in the wrong, etc. get my point. but, when you meditate on these "qualifications" of a friend it begs a question: will my friend fail me? unfortunately, he or she will, well, all but one friend. if Jesus is your best friend, He will never, never, ever fail you.

grocery stores

2006-01-19T03:20:00.000-06:00

grocery stores are a wonderful place to visit. as soon as you walk in the door all of your senses come alive. how can they not? there are odors, beautiful things to look at, magnificent things to touch, all kinds of sizes, shapes and colors to admire, and all kinds of sounds of life to listen to. they contain sweet stuff and sour stuff. they contain healthy stuff and less than healthy stuff. they contain spicy stuff and fortunately, not so spicy stuff. they contain expensive stuff and cheap stuff. they contain "on brands" and "off brands". just lots and lots of stuff that attract and ultimately - at least for a period of time - satisfy our senses. that's how life is. it has lots and lots of stuff that attracts our senses - our attention - at least for a while. the sad part is that we settle for temporary fulfillment of our senses instead of focusing on something - rather someone, that eternally satisfies all of our senses, passions, and our entire being eternally - Jesus.

wow!

2006-01-06T17:28:00.000-06:00

isn't it wonderful to be alive. it's like walking into your favorite candy store and having the freedom to pick out five pounds of your favorite chocolate and knowing that as you eat it not one ounce of fat will invade your body or one zit creep unto your face. life is good, no it's great! i get confused when i hear people talk about how miserable they are. yeah, i have my moments - i'm human! but they are short in duration - even the two times i flirted with death - when compared to the inescapable joy of living life. so, what is my secret? Jesus! He's the secret to everything - to all joy - to all happiness.

why party?

2006-01-01T06:48:00.000-06:00

aaargh! oh no! death is upon us and has once again overcome us. the old has died and the new has come. 2005 has gone - so quickly. what happened? where did it go? did it really last 52 weeks? did it really last 12 months? yet people cheered and partied and shot off fireworks as they celebrated in the streets. for something that has died. for something we will never see again. did we party because we're glad it's gone and hope the new is better? or did we party because we're thankful we experienced it? it does make a huge difference. thank you God for the many blessings you provided in 2005.

pleasure

2005-12-30T03:48:00.000-06:00

pleasure - what is it? one thing i know for sure is that it can be very, very elusive. why do i say that? look at my life. hey! look at our lives - we spend so much time and so much energy pursuing it. and yet we never seem to find it - lasting, eternal pleasure that is. think about it. or don't think about it. i mean, we can smell it, we can kind of see it, we can hear it calling our name, and it's so real we can taste it - if we could only reach out and touch it - pleasure! so, we race after this elusive pleasure. we pursue pleasure in some way our entire lives - from the moment we pop out into this world. man, we start crying. we liked the warmth and security of the womb - it was pleasant. then wow! we're out and we start crying and never stop. why? pleasure! we want pleasure, we want to be happy! and it continues right through young kids era - we need the xbox 360 - to teenagers era - we need the $70 jeans with holes in them - to adults era - we need the jaguar. pleasure! help! it has a hold of me. i'm going under! we're never satisfied. so it begs the question - can we ever truly find pleasure - i mean real pleasure that produces true happiness? i think so, er, what am i saying - i know so. Jesus - our life has to be Him - and talk about pleasure - sweet, i mean really, really sweet.

christmas

2005-12-25T06:39:00.000-06:00

Jesus was born - the angels rejoiced - the magi came - the heavenly host gave glory to God - people no longer had to "fear not" for their salvation - and God saw that it was good.

beauty

2005-12-23T14:12:00.000-06:00

the other day i commented on a blog by webel, called forevermore, about beauty. he raised the question about whether beauty can be described by words or not. i've been thinking about that a lot. i commented that you can't describe it with words, it has to be experienced - and i'm even more adamant about it now. how can you describe the view you have as you gaze out from the top of big mountain in montana? how can you describe the beauty you see as you walk along a trail in rocky mountain national park. how can you describe the scenery that you gulp down as you stroll the appalachian trail through the smokies? how do you tell someone about the waves that come crashing in along the craggy shore of maine? how do you describe the wondrous dancing of the multiple colored wild flowers on a glade in glacier national park? how do you describe the majesty of the bison and elk in yellowstone? how do you describe the beauty contained within the King of kings? You can't! It's impossible. It's impossible to describe the beauty of His creation. Isn't it wonderful that we don't have to - we can just experience the beauty.

a vapor, then ?

2005-12-20T09:37:00.000-06:00

wow! have you taken a look at the calendar lately? 2005 is almost history. impossible! it just began - i mean, just a few short weeks, er, months ago. and now it's gone - like a vapor. doesn't it make you just want to cry out and ask someone why it goes by so quick? yeah, we spend a few short years wanting to get older, then we spend the rest of our lives living in denial. i'm only 29! oh no, the big four-oh is just around the corner. know what i mean? could it be that we realize that life is only a vapor, but we're trying to stop it? could it be that we realize that we are but a vapor and we're trying to add significance to our lives by making it last longer? however, as the psalmist put it, at our best we are but vapor. something to think about as we walk out our lives. however, we can be assured of this - the next life will be eternal and the vapor will have a sweet fragrance - if our eternal state is found in heaven.

good over evil

2005-12-18T16:06:00.000-06:00

i saw narnia on friday night with a bunch of teenagers. great movie! the comments i heard were "i could have stayed for the next showing", "wish c. s. lewis could have seen it", "wow", and "that was really neat". it's amazing how far movies have come. however, what's even more amazing is how good still triumphs over evil. yep, we live in a world where good WILL triumph over evil, even though there seems to be so much evil. you can take it to the bank. in the end, aslan will reign supreme and all will be good in narnia. no, not good - things will be indescribable when aslan returns.

happy holiday!?!

2005-12-16T09:06:00.000-06:00

have you ever wondered why so many people are saying happy holidays instead of Merry Christmas? i mean what holiday are they talking about? the only one's around are Christmas, Hanukkah, and New Year's Day. which one are they referring to? it's confusing me. i just wish people would say what they mean. if they're wishing me a Merry Christmas, then say so. if Hanukkah or New Years, then say so. are people embarrassed? are they timid? are they confused? do they have no identity with one of these days? do they not respect people if they believe in something? or even worse - are they too afraid to stand up for something that counts?

sunday day cares

2005-12-11T07:40:00.000-06:00

my wife kris and i were hanging out with some friends last night just talking and solving the world's problems - you know what i mean. all of a sudden he came out with a statement that caught me off guard. he said that most churches were nothing more than "sunday day cares" and that is what so many people are looking for. is that what the church has become? is that what Jesus wants? the Bible seems to indicate that it should be a "dynamic revolutionary movement without walls". does that have anything to do with why only 15% of today's younger generation is expected to be evangelical Christian? something to think about.

more thoughts on life

2005-12-10T10:41:00.000-06:00

life is changing! it's so different than it was a few years ago. it's radically different than what it was a few decades ago. it's indescribably different than what it was a few centuries ago. and it seems to be changing more and more rapidly. how are we suppose to keep up? it's like going to your favorite store and finding that they have changed everything around. it happens all the time. but it stresses me out. i'd rather they keep things in the same place. i think we're a lot like that with life. leave it alone! don't mess with it! keep it at the same pace. yet, they keep messing with it. and it keeps stressing people out. kind of bitter sweet. we want more, but we want the same. therefore stress and frustration comes about. maybe we just need to figure out how to be contented with less.

sleepless in missouri

2005-12-07T00:53:00.000-06:00

seattle isn't the only place where you can have a sleepless night. it happens everywhere, even in central missouri. why? good question, gary! i think it boils down to the mind. the body wants to go to sleep, but the mind screams out no - i want to think. i want to think about things. then this battle ensues. body tries to rebuke the mind. mind responds with a thrust of activity. body then tries to deceive the mind by pretending it is relaxed and not caring. mind figures that tactic out rapidly and takes advantage by diverting more energy into thinking. body then gets up and paces the floor believing it will wear itself out and steal energy from the mind and simply pass out in bed. but the mind maintains the upper hand by drawing on some unknown energy source and is not thwarted, simply continuing to process the information overload. then the mind strikes the lethal blow - it sends out a raiding party to find an ally in the body - the target being the heart. why does it do that? because the mind knows that if it can get the heart involved as an ally that victory will be assured over the body. see, it's a plot. or is it really the heart getting the mind involved. either way, body loses. so who is really in control? the mind? the body? the heart? the body and the heart? i'm tired and going to bed. hopefully i will fall asleep and not have to figure it out.

thinking about life

2005-12-04T22:06:00.000-06:00

i was just reading some stuff about life. you know, it could almost seem like no one has it figured out. no one! the evidence to that is how many different approaches people take to life. some live it on the edge. others are couch potatoes. some think religion is a significant part. others proclaim to be bonafide atheists. some are pleased with their weight. some are dieting constantly. some like sports. others like reading books. i could go on, but you get the point. it seems to me that if we understood what life was about that there would be more commanality to everyone's approach. maybe, just maybe, we're missing the point of life. maybe, just maybe we're not living on the real edge. maybe, just maybe we're taking the wrong approach to life. maybe, just maybe.

the future

2005-12-02T07:31:00.000-06:00

i was thinking about my future the other day. there was a time that I was obsessed about my future. it seemed that all i could think about was what it was going to be like, what i was going to do, what catastrophe lay hiding around the corner, who i was going to marry, what job i would have, what happened when you died, and on and on. and it whacked me in the head how much i've changed. i still think about my future, but it's totally different now. i know I'm a citizen of heaven and that my future is eternally and gloriously secured. wow! i also know that God's sovereign hand is on me and that He will take care of me, so even my future here is secure. double wow! and i benefit in the present with peace and contentment. sweet!

the heart

2005-11-30T06:51:00.000-06:00

i woke up this morning at 5:26 am. i think it was God. i started thinking about the heart. it's an amazing thing, the heart. it provides both natural and spiritual life. without it pumping the red stuff we'd be in a pretty serious way. i think we all agree with that. at least the doctors do. but what about the spiritual heart? what's it's purpose? i think when we are born we begin an adventure - an adventure to find our heart. it's like hiking in the mountains, we just keep going up and up with an excited anticipation that there will be something more beautiful around the next bend. sometimes we see that beauty. but, all too often, it's more like walking through a junkyard and around each corner is another piece of ugly, rusting scrap metal. God, help me to have Your heart, to delight in You that Your heart will touch my heart - and allow it to see the beauty around the corner instead of the ugliness.

two in one day - wow!

2005-11-29T13:06:00.000-06:00

i love colorado. it is glorious. some say it just happened. amazing. yet when i go there - which is as often as i can - i see God's fingerprints all over the place. can you imagine what eden was like? i can't.

my initial thoughts

2005-11-29T12:28:00.000-06:00

isn't it amazing that we live in a world where we can have a blog and post our thoughts. i thought about this for awhile and decided to go for it. trust me, i'm not thinking that what i post will shake the foundations of the world or determine what you will have for breakfast or determine who the next president is. however, i hope to plant some ideas - some thoughts to banty about, to think about. here's the first: we are a spiritual people. everyone believes in something supernatural. everyone has faith. whether you believe in God, Yahweh, Allah, evolution, intelligent design, or your old ford mustang that you have great plans for. find a person on their death bed - any person - and when they know they're dying, they'll cry out for something - someone. i'll be right up front, i believe in a triune God - God the Father, God the Son (whom is know as Jesus the Christ), and God the Holy Spirit. i look forward to hearing from people - if in fact i hear from anyone. if i don't, i'll still enjoy typing out my random thoughts.